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Close Encounters
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Close Encounters
Communication in Relationships

Fifth Edition
Additional resources:


March 2017 | 552 pages | SAGE Publications, Inc

“Written by leading communication scholars, this text provides an excellent blend of classic and contemporary research on communication in relationships written in an accessible style that is sure to engage students. It’s a textbook instructors can trust and students can enjoy.”

Janie Harden Fritz, Duquesne University

 

A relational approach to the study of interpersonal communication

Close Encounters: Communication in Relationships, Fifth Edition helps students better understand their relationships with romantic partners, friends, and family members. Bestselling authors Laura K. Guerrero, Peter A. Andersen, and Walid A. Afifi offer research-based insights and content illustrated with engaging scenarios to show how state-of-the-art research and theory can be applied to specific issues within relationships—with a focus on issues that are central to describing and understanding close relationships.

While maintaining the spotlight on communication, the authors also emphasize the interdisciplinary nature of the study of personal relationships by including research from such disciplines as social psychology and family studies. The book covers issues relevant to developing, maintaining, repairing, and ending relationships. Both the "bright" and "dark" sides of interpersonal communication within relationships are explored.

Give your students the SAGE edge!

 

SAGE edge offers a robust online environment featuring an impressive array of free tools and resources for review, study, and further exploration, keeping both instructors and students on the cutting edge of teaching and learning. Learn more at edge.sagepub.com/guerrero5e


 
Conceptualizing Relational Communication: Definitions and Principles
 
The Field of Personal Relationships: A Brief History
The Field of Personal Relationships: A Brief History

 
Contributions of Social Psychology

 
Roots in Other Disciplines

 
 
Relationships
General Types of Relationships

 
Need Fulfillment in Close Relationships

 
Relationship Categories

 
Characteristics Distinguishing Different Relationship Types

 
 
Principles of Interpersonal Communication
Verbal and Nonverbal Messages

 
Communication as Inevitable

 
Interpersonal Communication Goals

 
Effectiveness and Shared Meaning

 
Content versus Relational Information

 
Symmetry in Communication

 
 
Principles of Relational Communication
Relationships Emerge Across Ongoing Interactions

 
Relationships Contextualize Messages

 
Communication Sends a Variety of Relational Messages

 
Relational Communication is Dynamic

 
Relational Communication Follows both Linear and Nonlinear Patterns

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Communicating Identity: The Social Self
 
The Development of Personal Identity
Defining Identity

 
Human Nature and Identity

 
Communication and Identity

 
Culture and Ethnic Identity

 
The Image: Creating an Identity

 
“Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation”: Millennials and Generation Zers’ Identity

 
Social Networking and Identity

 
Identity, Perception, and Self-Esteem

 
Expanding Identity

 
 
The Principles of Identity Management
Identity and Hierarchical Structure

 
Identity and the Looking-Glass Self

 
Identity and the Interpretation of Feedback

 
Identity, Expectations, and Behavior

 
Identity and Self-Evaluation

 
Identity and Goal Achievement

 
Identity and Relationships

 
 
Communicating Identity to Others
General Issues in Self-Presentation

 
“Life Is a Stage”: The Dramaturgical Perspective

 
Politeness Theory

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Drawing People Together: Forces of Social Attraction
 
Attraction
Types of Attraction

 
Fatal Attraction

 
 
A Framework for Understanding Attraction
 
Personal Qualities
Perceptions of Reward Value

 
Expectations

 
Biological Aspects of Attraction

 
Demographic Characteristics

 
Personality

 
 
Other People’s Qualities
Physical Attractiveness

 
Interpersonal Communication Skills

 
The “Hard-to-Get” Phenomenon

 
 
Qualities of the Pair
Similarity: “Birds of a Feather Flock Together”

 
Complementarity: Sometimes Opposites Attract

 
Similarity and Complementarity in Initial versus Committed Relationships

 
 
Qualities of the Physical or Social Environment
Physical Environment

 
Proximity

 
Social Environment

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Making Sense of Our World: Managing Uncertainty and Expectancy Violations
 
Uncertainty
Uncertainty Reduction Theory: Issues and Challenges

 
The Motivation to Reduce Uncertainty

 
The Relationship Between Communication and Uncertainty

 
General Strategies for Reducing Uncertainty

 
Secret Tests

 
Predicted Outcome Value Theory

 
The Theory of Motivated Information Management

 
The Model of Relational Turbulence

 
 
Expectancy Violations
Expectancy Violations Theory

 
Types of Expectancy Violations in Close Relationships

 
Expectancy Violations and Uncertainty in Specific Contexts

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Changing Relationships: Stages, Turning Points, and Dialectics
 
Communication Skills
 
Relationship Stages
The “Coming Together” Stages

 
The “Coming-Apart” Stages

 
The Ordering and Timing of Stages

 
 
Turning Points
Communication-Based Turning Points

 
Activities and Special Occasions

 
Events Related to Passion and Romance

 
Events Related to Commitment and Exclusivity

 
Changes in Families and Social Networks

 
Proximity and Distance

 
Crisis and Conflict

 
Perceptual Changes

 
 
The Dialectical Perspective
Relational Dialectics Theory

 
Dialectical Tensions in Friendships

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Revealing and Hiding Ourselves: Self-Disclosure and Privacy
 
Self-Disclosure
Dimensions of Self-Disclosure

 
Self-Disclosure and Liking

 
Risks Associated With Self-Disclosure

 
 
Privacy
Privacy Ownership

 
Privacy Control

 
Boundary Turbulence

 
Influences on Rules for Boundary Management

 
Negotiating Privacy Boundaries in Relationships: Challenges and Violations

 
 
Topic Avoidance and Secret Keeping
Topics Commonly Avoided or Kept Secret

 
Reasons for Topic Avoidance and Secret Keeping

 
How People Engage in Topic Avoidance

 
Topic Avoidance During Relationship Transitions

 
Consequences of Topic Avoidance

 
Consequences of Secret Keeping

 
Consequences of Revealing Secrets

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Communicating Closeness: Affection, Immediacy, and Social Support
 
Closeness in Relationships
Physical Closeness

 
Emotional Closeness

 
Relational Closeness

 
Communicating Closeness

 
 
Affectionate Communication
Affection Exchange Theory

 
Communicating Affection

 
 
Immediacy Behavior
Verbal Immediacy

 
Nonverbal Immediacy

 
 
Cognitive Valence Theory
Behavior

 
Perception

 
Arousal

 
Cognition

 
Relational Outcomes

 
 
Supportive Communication
The Dual Process Model of Supportive Communication

 
Invisible Support

 
Person-Centered Messages

 
Nonverbal Immediacy

 
 
Sex Differences in the Experience and Expression of Closeness
Perceptions of Closeness

 
Communication of Closeness

 
Preferences for Same-Sex Versus Cross-Sex Friendships

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Making a Love Connection: Styles of Love and Attachment
 
What is Love?
Love Versus Liking

 
Love as a Triangle

 
Finding Love and Falling in Love

 
 
Love Styles
Lee’s Love Styles

 
Ways to Communicate Love

 
 
Attachment Theory
The Propensity for Forming Attachments

 
Internal Working Models and Attachment Styles

 
Attachment Styles in Childhood

 
Attachment Styles in Adulthood

 
Attachment and Relational Satisfaction

 
Stability and Change in Attachment Styles across the Life Span

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Communicating Sexually: The Closest Physical Encounter
 
Sex in Relationships
Sex in Short-Term and Early Dating Relationships

 
Sex in Long-Term Relationships

 
Sex Differences

 
Sex in Same-Sex Relationships

 
 
Sexual Attitudes
Developing Sexual Attitudes and Beliefs

 
 
Communication About Sex
Courtship and Flirtation

 
Communication, Sexual Satisfaction, and Relational Satisfaction

 
Sexual Scripts

 
Pillow Talk

 
 
Sexual Coercion and Harassment
Sexual Coercion

 
Sexual Harassment

 
 
Communication and Safe Sex
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Staying Close: Maintaining Relationships
 
Defining Relational Maintenance
 
Behaviors Used to Maintain Relationships
Prosocial Maintenance Behaviors

 
Antisocial Maintenance Behavior

 
Modality of Maintenance Behavior

 
Strategic and Routine Maintenance Behaviors

 
 
Maintenance Behavior in Romantic Relationships
Changes in Maintenance over the Course of Romantic Relationships

 
Maintenance in Gay and Lesbian Relationships

 
 
Maintenance Behavior in Same-Sex Friendships
Talking Versus Doing

 
Men and Women are from the Same Planet

 
 
Maintenance Behavior in Cross-Sex Friendships
Challenges in Cross-Sex Friendships

 
Coping with Romantic Intent

 
Keeping Friendships Platonic

 
 
Maintenance Challenges in Other Relationships
Friends with Benefits Relationships

 
Long-Distance Relationships

 
Co-habiting Relationships

 
 
Equity Theory
Principles of Equity Theory

 
Reducing Distress in Inequitable Relationships

 
Combined Influence of Benefit-Cost Rations and Equity

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Coping with Conflict: When Relational Partners Disagree
 
Conflict in Relationships
Defining Conflict

 
Frequency of Conflict in Various Relationships

 
Effects of Conflict on Relationships

 
 
Conflict Styles
Competitive Fighting

 
Compromising

 
Collaborating

 
Indirect Fighting

 
Avoiding

 
Yielding

 
 
Patterns of Conflict Interaction
Negative Reciprocity

 
Demand-Withdraw

 
The Four Horseman of the Apocalypse

 
Accommodation

 
 
Explanations for Conflict Patterns
Emotional Flooding

 
Attributions

 
Communication Skill Deficits

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Influencing Each Other: Dominance and Power Plays in Relationships
 
Defining Power and Related Terms
 
The Power Principles
Power as a Perception

 
Power as a Relational Concept

 
Power as Resource Based

 
Power as Having Less to Lose

 
Power as Enabling or Disabling

 
Power as a Prerogative

 
 
Interpersonal Influence Goals
Making Lifestyle Changes

 
Gaining Assistance

 
Sharing Activities

 
Initiating Sexual Activity

 
Changing Political Attitudes

 
Giving Health Advice

 
Changing Relationships

 
 
Verbal Power Ploys
Verbal Influence Strategies

 
Relational Control Moves: One-Ups and One-Downs

 
Powerful and Powerless Speech

 
 
Nonverbal Positions of Power
Physical Appearance

 
Spatial Behavior

 
Eye Behavior

 
Body Movements

 
Touch

 
The Voice

 
Times

 
Artifacts

 
 
The Power and Influence in Families
Parent and Child Relationships

 
Traditional Versus Egalitarian Marriages

 
Summary and Application

 
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Hurting the Ones We Love: Relational Transgressions
 
Hurt Feelings in Relationships
Relational Transgressions

 
Hurtful Messages

 
Types of Hurtful Messages

 
Responses to Hurtful Messages

 
 
Deception
Types of Deception

 
Motives for Deception

 
Deception Detection

 
Effects of Deception on Relationships

 
 
Infidelity
Types of Infidelity

 
Behavioral Cues to Infidelity

 
Sex Differences in Reactions to Infidelity

 
 
Jealousy
Characteristics of Jealousy

 
Experiencing Romantic Jealousy

 
Communicative Responses to Jealousy

 
Jealousy and Relational Satisfaction

 
Sex Differences in Jealous Emotions and Communication

 
 
Unrequited Love
 
Obsessive Relational Intrusion
Reasons People Use Obsessive Relational Intrusion Behavior

 
Consequences of Obsessive Relational Intrusion Behavior

 
 
Relational Violence
Common Couple Violence

 
Intimate Terrorism

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Healing the Hurt: Relationship Repair and Reconciliation
 
Investment Model of Relationship-Maintaining Behavior
Commitment

 
Pro-Relationship Behaviors

 
 
The Model of Accommodation
Destructive Behaviors

 
Constructive Behaviors

 
 
Remedial Strategies
Apologies and Concessions

 
Appeasement

 
Explanations

 
Denials

 
Avoidance and Evasion

 
Relationship Talk

 
 
Forgiveness
Forgiving Communication

 
Conditions That Promote or Impede Forgiveness and Forgiving Communication

 
 
Relational Reconciliation
Reconciliation Strategies

 
Reintegration in the Social Network

 
 
On-Again Off-Again Relationships
 
Relational Redefinition
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site
 
Ending Relationships: Disengagement and Termination
 
Why Relationships End
Infidelity and Interest in a Third Party

 
Incompatibility

 
Alcohol and Drugs

 
Growing Apart

 
Loss of Love

 
Equity Issues Related to Family Obligations

 
 
Communication as a Cause of Relational Breakup
Withdrawal

 
Negative Communication

 
Lack of Openness and Intimacy

 
Abusive Communication

 
 
The Disengagement Process
A Process Model of Relational Dissolution

 
Catastrophe Theory

 
 
Fifteen Ways to Leave Your Partner
Unilateral and Indirect Strategy

 
Unilateral and Indirect Strategies

 
Bilateral and Indirect Strategy

 
Bilateral and Direct Strategies

 
 
Outcomes: The Results of Relationships Endings
Negative Outcomes of Relational Breakups

 
Healing After a Separation

 
Positive Outcomes of Relational Breakups

 
 
Summary and Application
 
Key Terms
 
Discussion Questions
 
Student Study Site

Supplements

Student study site

SAGE edge for Students provides a personalized approach to help students accomplish their coursework goals in an easy-to-use learning environment.

  • Mobile-friendly eFlashcards strengthen understanding of key terms and concepts
  • Mobile-friendly practice quizzes allow for independent assessment by students of their mastery of course material
  • A  customized online action plan includes tips and feedback on progress through the course and materials, which allows students to individualize their learning experience
  • Learning objectives reinforce the most important material
  • Video and Multimedia links facilitate further exploration of topics
  • EXCLUSIVE! Access to full-text SAGE journal articles that have been carefully selected to support and expand on the concepts presented in each chapter
Instructor site

SAGE edge for Instructors supports teaching by making it easy to integrate quality content and create a rich learning environment for students.

  • Test banks provide a diverse range of pre-written options as well as the opportunity to edit any question and/or insert personalized questions to effectively assess students’ progress and understanding
  • Sample course syllabi for semester and quarter courses provide suggested models for structuring one’s course
  • Editable, chapter-specific PowerPoint® slides offer complete flexibility for creating a multimedia presentation for the course
  • EXCLUSIVE! Access to full-text SAGE journal articles have been carefully selected to support and expand on the concepts presented in each chapter to encourage students to think critically
  • Video and multimedia links that appeal to students with different learning styles

“The pedagogical activities and supplements create opportunities for students to apply classroom concepts to real-life situations.”

Rukhsana Ahmed
University of Ottawa

“Written by leading communication scholars, this text provides an excellent blend of classic and contemporary research on communication in relationships written in an accessible style that is sure to engage students. It’s a textbook instructors can trust and students can enjoy.”

Janie Harden Fritz
Duquesne University

“The authors have conceptualized an interesting, well-written book that inspires student learning. The interdisciplinary approach of this book allows for the most influential theories and concepts to be discussed in a systematic manner.”

Kandi Walker
University of Louisville

“A must read for teachers and students alike to have a better understanding of our interpersonal relationships in the new age!”

Cheryl Pawlowski
Professor of Communication Studies at The University of Northern Colorado

“This book does a superb job in providing the most comprehensive, up-to-date knowledge about Close Relationship Communication!”

Dr. Xiaowei Shi
Middle Tennessee State University

“This book provides the most up to date, relatable information to current students. The book is easy to read and invites students to discover more about their own interpersonal relationships while learning more about theories that form the basis for our discipline.”

Annelise Ewing Goodman
James Madison University

“A social scientific approach to interpersonal communication that is very thorough at going through much of the pertinent literature. For the social scientist, this will be an approach he/she can appreciate.”

Cory Williams
Concord University

“The book is user friendly and it’s very applicable.”

Leslie Ramos Salazar
California State University, Fresno

“I like the way the authors apply scholarship in an easily digestible manner.”

Valerie Young
Hanover College

“I’ve always appreciated how the text facilitates an identification and examination of the basic elements of the human communication process. The texts connection to understanding the self, first and then how we set “roles” and “goals” that include language and verbal communication, nonverbal communication, relational messages, self-identity, perception, listening, social roles, and communication climate is great. Also, several of the activities within the text challenge students to observe and reflect on these elements as they apply to their own lives in various social contexts. The contexts students will examine because of departmental agendas include intercultural settings, family interaction, public relationships, friendships, intimate relationships, and gender communication toward social justice. Therefore, the text is ideal in aiding in recognition how the basic elements of communication and specific contexts are framed and shaped by broader cultural, historical, and social forces. Most importantly, this text provides opportunities to engage in transformative education by a thoughtful facilitation of interpersonal contexts”

Nicholas A. Zoffel
Sierra College
Key features

NEW TO THIS EDITION

  • The latest relational communication research and topics of high interest to students is incorporated throughout, with new material on Generation Z, love languages, friends with benefits relationships, on-again off-again relationships, flirting styles, and pillow talk. 
  • Descriptions of several theories have been revised based on new research and theoretical developments such as the theory of motivated information management, the model of relational turbulence, communication privacy management theory, relational pursuit theory, and Gottman's conflict theory.
  • Updated “Talk Tech" boxes in every chapter highlight various ways that new technologies, such as texting, snapchatting, and social networking sites, impact personal relationships.
  • Updated "Around the World" boxes feature the ways that current relational communication is similar and different across cultures or within intercultural versus intracultural couples.

KEY FEATURES

  • Current, interdisciplinary research: The research in Close Encounters reflects the interdisciplinary nature of the study of personal relationships and draws from across the social science disciplines while maintaining a focus on communication. This edition has been carefully updated to include recent cutting-edge research on interpersonal communication.
  • High-interest topics: Intriguing subjects, such as long-distance relationships, cross-sex friendships, friends with benefits, flirting, sexual interaction, on-again off-again relationships, cohabitation, and the “dark side” of relational communication are explored in depth.
  • “Put Yourself to the Test” boxes: These exercises, found throughout the book, assess various aspects of students’ own relationships and communication styles.
  • “Highlights” boxes: These boxes take a closer look at issues in relational research and challenge students to think critically about research and popular concepts.
  • “Around the World” boxes: These boxes help students understand and appreciate that relational communication is partially determined by culture and that they should not assume that someone from another culture thinks or communicates the same as they do.
  • “Tech Talk” boxes: These boxes feature research that looks at how people use technology and new media (such as cell phones, social networking sites, the Internet, and blogs) to develop and manage relationships.
  • Discussion Questions: These questions, which are found at the end of each chapter, can help students prepare for class or they can be used as springboards for classroom discussion. Some instructors also have students write position papers in response to some of the discussion questions.
  • Free SAGE edge online resources make teaching and learning easier with a password-protected Instructor Teaching Site and an open-access Student Study Site.

Sample Materials & Chapters

Chapter 6. Revealing and Hiding Ourselves


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