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From Conflict to Conciliation
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From Conflict to Conciliation
How to Defuse Difficult Situations

Edited by:


February 2010 | 184 pages | Corwin

"The Six-C approach provides a framework within which people can work together to attack the problem, not each other. By ending each conflict with conciliation, those who use this approach can do much more than resolve conflict—they can build each other up so future conflicts will be easier to resolve."
—Bob Bowen, Chief Executive Officer
The Mandt System, Inc.

Don't let conflict get in the way of meaningful collaboration!

Conflict is inevitable, but educators can work together effectively if they understand how to defuse difficult situations before they escalate. This resource describes the Six-C process, a conflict resolution method that allows educators to take progressively more assertive steps as necessary to resolve disagreements.

Based on research and easy to remember, this approach helps readers handle challenging situations using the least amount of time and energy. Illustrated with many examples and scenarios, the six steps are:

  • Concern: identifying actionable concerns
  • Confer: expressing concerns in nonthreatening ways
  • Consult: reviewing and clarifying the situation collaboratively
  • Confront: considering consequences and giving clear warnings
  • Combat: taking sustained, logical action
  • Conciliation: mending the wounds and restoring relationships

Focused on preserving relationships while resolving disagreements, From Conflict to Conciliation can be used in any situation or setting, from the classroom to the community.


 
Preface
 
Acknowledgments
 
About the Authors
 
1. Conflict and the Six-C Process
Introduction

 
Research and Anecdotal Support

 
What Is Unique About This Book?

 
The Six-C Process

 
The Conciliation Capstone

 
Saving Time and Energy

 
Conflict Is Inevitable

 
The Use and Misuse of Power

 
The Democratic Ideal

 
Why Everyone Matters

 
The Perceptual Tradition

 
When Viewpoints Conflict

 
Acceptance Versus Agreement

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
2. Concern
Latent Concerns

 
Actionable Concerns

 
What Is a Concern?

 
What Are Moral and Ethical Concerns?

 
What Are Your Concerns?

 
Potential Concerns at School

 
Potential Concerns at Home

 
Potential Concerns in the Community

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
3. Confer
Setting the Stage for Conferring

 
Can You Express Your Concern Clearly?

 
Can You Look Beyond the Immediate Concern?

 
Is There Room for Compromise or Re-Conceptualization?

 
The Value of Seeking Commitment

 
Helpful Communication Skills

 
The 3+++wish? Formula

 
Practicing the 3+++wish? Formula

 
Handling Challenges

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
4. Consult
Considering the Situation

 
What Is a Consulting Relationship?

 
Using a Triangular Structure

 
Involving Others in a Consultation

 
Sequential Steps for Consulting

 
Practicing the Consulting Sequence

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
5. Confront
Questions to Ask Yourself

 
Difference Between Conflict and Confrontation

 
Understanding Confrontation

 
Adapting Constructive Confrontation

 
Applying Practical Tips

 
Major Themes

 
 
6. Combat
Constraints on Combat

 
The Use of Power

 
Increasing Chances for a Desirable Outcome

 
Taking a Stand

 
Civilized Dissent

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
7. Conciliation and Beyond
Conciliation After Combat

 
Conciliation as a Reflective Process

 
Beyond Conciliation

 
Summary

 
Major Themes

 
 
References and Resources
 
Index

"This book contains a wealth of strategies to use on a daily basis for interacting effectively with others. Educators will enjoy teaching these valuable life skills to their students and seeing the positive results."

Jenny Edwards, Faculty, Fielding Graduate University
Author, Inviting Students to Learn

“Every teacher should study the Six-C Process. The authors provide a positive, constructive, and hands-on approach to dealing with challenging situations. What a great process for educators to use!”

David A. Chapman, Superintendent
South Vermillion Community Schools, Clinton, IN

"A truly brilliant guide to help the reader assess the inevitable conflicts of daily life! Through a step-by-step process, the authors share pointed questions that can prevent conflicts of life and work from becoming overwhelming. Readers will find this useful for building personal relationships as well as professional ones."

Sue Bowen, Retired Assistant Superintendent
Woodford County Schools, Versailles, KY

“The 6-C process adds a unique dimension to conflict resolution. My experience with the 6 Cs integrated in the Grow With Guidance System produced powerful and empowering results. Thank you for this dynamic book!”

Tommie R. Radd, Counselor
Columbus City Schools, OH

"The authors recommend useful strategies for improving the human condition using the least amount of energy and time. This is a good read for employees and managers who work with the diverse individuals in today's fast-paced and competitive workplace."

Belquis Majboor
JAME magazine, 2010, (Vol. 15, No. 4)
  •  
Key features
  • Educators can use the techniques described in this book with both peers and students
  • The book offers more than other conflict-resolution books because it acknowledges that conflict is inevitable while also stressing healthy ways to reach conciliation
  • Teachers and counselors can use the methods to model conflict-resolution skills for their students
  • The techniques are simple and easy to follow as well as theoretically sound.
  • The book is based on Invitational Education, a theory of practice maintaining that every person and everything in and around schools adds to or subtracts from the process of being a beneficial presence in the lives of human beings (http://www.invitationaleducation.net/)

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